these thoughts have been circling around in my mind for a long time now, guess I should get them out. I don't deal with death and tragedy in the normal way. I accept the fact stuff has happened (ie, someone died) and continue on with my life. I don't cry much anymore when I found out someone died, when I'm at viewings or funerals. if anything, I feel uncomfortable because everyone else is crying and I'm not. I could see being called insensitive, but the reality is I prefer to deal with this stuff on my own time in my own way.
I am no stranger to death, my first funeral was for a family member just a few years older than me. I was 13. during my five years of college, I've been to four funerals: 3 grandparents and one for a cousin (again just a few years older than me). I've been to viewings and been the shoulder to cry on, putting aside my own discomfort for the sake of others.
so today, 9/11. I probably am being insensitive, wanting to just carry on with my day as normal. 9/11 did hit too close when it happened, after all, my dad worked at the Pentagon at the time. fortunately, he was on the side not struck and made it out safely. I was terrorized that day, not being able to get a hold of my parents, not knowing if my dad was ok. so maybe I just like to bypass 9/11 so I don't have to remember all those crazy emotions.
tragedy happens, death happens. there's no way to avoid it, so I guess I rather not dwell on the unavoidable and just keep moving on with life. is this bad?
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